Contact for Earth People:
booksfromearth.com
facebook.com/booksfromearth
twitter.com/booksfromearth
Contact for Aliens:
Dear Beings-who-did-not-originate-on-Earth (aka “Aliens”),
We want to immediately appreciate your interest in Books from Earth (aka BFE). BFE invites you to experience Earth’s great books through this website and podcast. We hope you enjoy our literature on a galactic scale.
Of course, if you have already read some books from Earth, you may have noticed that in some books there are alien characters. We want to reassure you that the aliens portrayed in the stories (including in motion pictures) are fictional – that means they are made up and by no means represent accurately what aliens are like in both appearance or personality. Our authors are merely creating alien characters to serve the plot of the story.
One of the first things we earthlings learn about made up stories is that it can’t be a story without a conflict, problem, or at least anxiety producing tension. If a story does not have this element, it does not have a plot and therefore fails to be a story and instead becomes a bore or a poem. Earthlings refuse to read a bore.
That’s where aliens come in. Because aliens are imagined, aliens can have any number of features — big teeth, slime, hard exoskeletons, advanced stealth tech and weaponry, politics, mind control, infestation embryos, hunger, disturbing reproductive habits, schemes — that make them scary and prone to creating conflict, problems, or at least anxiety producing tension. Therefore many of our stories feature aliens who are violent enemies to earthlings.
Once you reveal yourselves to us, we will finally get to know the real you — how you are nice and friendly and just want to cozy up, hard exoskeleton and all, with a great book from Earth. Also depending on the technology and innate alien abilities you bring, we could use your help.
At the outset let me point out at that Earth is highly self-sufficient, but we could use some help. Any space travel tech is welcome; we haven’t gone farther than our own moon yet. Anything health related would be useful, such as scanners, tricorders, cellular regeneration, harmless cigarettes, and something better than fluoride that taste good. Last, if you can help us become completely peaceful (without conquering us), please give it a try.
We hope you come visit us (assuming you are not like any of the stories we’ve made up about you except E.T.), and along the Milky Way, please listen to Books From Earth, subscribe to it, and rate us highly.
From all of us at Books From Earth – Safe Travels!